7 Signs You’re Experiencing Major Spiritual Awakening – NatashaChe
(Art by Julia Watkins) Life has thrown suffering your way and propelled you on a truth-seeking path. There’s no turning back. If you’re anything like me, you’ve meditated, gone to workshops, read books, listened to the masters. You’ve healed your past-life traumas and embraced your shadows. You’ve been feeling incrementally better, and theoretically wiser. Because you’re almost a spiritual Wikipedia…
Life has thrown suffering your way and propelled you on a truth-seeking path. There’s no turning back. If you’re anything like me, you’ve meditated, gone to workshops, read books, listened to the masters. You’ve healed your past-life traumas and embraced your shadows. You’ve been feeling incrementally better, and theoretically wiser. Because you’re almost a spiritual Wikipedia by now. You know every spiritual concept and healing modality and positive affirmation out there. What else can they teach you?
But just as you became almost content treading the sensible path of human improvement inch by inch, it started– the mysterious process of real transformation, which takes you by storm and throws all the spiritual rules you learned out of the window. It’s chaotic, explosive, confusing, yet at the same time the most intelligent and elegant process ever. If you know what I’m talking about, good for you. If you suspect you know what I’m talking about because it is happening to you right now, then read on.
All the mystics who came before you, be it Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad, or Snoopy, had periods of disappearance into the void– the empty spots on the timeline of their life when it seemed they had suddenly dropped off the edge of the planet. Nobody knew where they were and what they were doing. They went alone, they went within, relinquishing their old limited identity and becoming something more expanded, powerful, and closer to their true self. In a sense what you’re experiencing is similar. Except that they had a desert or a cave to go to, instead of living in midtown Manhattan and riding the metro to work everyday. Now we don’t have that many caves left to legally occupy. But that doesn’t mean the archetypal process of spiritual transformation has changed in its essence.
Despite sounding benign, the kind of spiritual shift I’m talking about is most likely inconvenient to your daily life and worse, makes you question your own sanity. Because from an outside perspective, what you’re experiencing…um…sucks. (A catholic monk once wrote a book about how much it sucked for him. You’ve likely heard of the book. It has a depressing name. But I feel the author is more than a bit masochistic. So, reader beware.) Maybe the most maddening part is that you don’t know where it is going– you’re certainly not the one in control. Many things can happen in the process, including…
1. Your mind is empty.
Sometimes it feels like your mind has been sent for service at the dealer shop. You may not even be aware of its absence–we take it for granted too much– until you need it for reading a newspaper or crunching some serious numbers. And then to your great horror, you realize you can’t comprehend any written words and have lost the ability to count. I’m not even talking in metaphor. you don’t feel like meditating anymore. In fact, you don’t feel like doing anything much of the time, which makes you an extremely boring person to be around. Although you’ve been slacking on meditation and all of your other spiritual “practices”, you have the strange feeling that you’re actually meditating all the time, even when you’re brushing your teeth or doing the laundry. It is true—you’re meditating 24/7, mostly without your conscious awareness. Thoughts run through you faster than ever. One moment you have a lot of them. The next thing you know, they’ve all disappeared out of thin air and leave you totally empty. Sometimes your mind is so vacant that you want to puke, or punch someone in the face. Yet you notice an underlining stillness in you no matter where you go. Sound contradictory? Trust me, they’re not.
2. You’re cut off from the world and oddly, you feel OK with it.
You feel like you’re living in the middle of a desert, alone. No matter how gregarious you used to be, by the middle of this you probably find yourself alarmingly isolated. All your social charms are gone. You don’t even know how to talk properly (because your mind is on leave). Yet most of the time you feel just fine without company. Aloneness is rich and meditative and seldom lonely. You don’t have much desire to connect with the world anyway. In fact, you’ve become so sensitive that if you go to over-crowded venues, after a while you feel dizzy and overwhelmed. You find yourself sort of withdrawn energetically even when you’re interacting with others. And if your head is stuffed with spiritual doctrines, this would freak you out, because being spiritually advanced means you should be as open as possible, no? No. The alchemical change process needs space to happen. When the caterpillar is morphing, you don’t cut the chrysalis and expose it to the open air. Similarly, things are happening in you that the eyes can’t see. Listen to your body. And don’t force yourself to be any other way than what every cell of you wants to be.